When you pack for your trip, remember your shoes, socks, clothes, etc. But also remember to pack love, kindness, consideration and a friend.

After everything that has happened over the past two years of my life, I am finally here. I’m just getting ready to load up and fly away with Josh. We can’t really stand to just sit still. For me, I’m excited to reach another country. To see the beauty and culture in another part of the world. This has me reflecting back to my high school days. I used to teach English as a second language in the evenings to immigrants. If I’m honest, the moment I stepped into the ELL class at my school as the teacher assistant, my life hit its trajectory then. Then learning to teach ESL in the evenings on top of everything else, my life was set. I couldn’t just stick to the normal American path. At some point, something had to give.

You know, there has been this idea floating around about proving people wrong about you. Back in about 2008, it was: “prove your haters wrong!” The idea that there were people out to bring you down in life. Really, I have found this rarely to be the case. No, the people who have held me back from pursuing my dreams and passions have all been well-meaning. My mother for one is a beautiful woman and while we have many disagreements she has always wanted what is best for me. There were countless times while I was single that I made plans to travel. I even wanted to become essentially a nomadic ESL teacher. I thought of getting certified then going to Japan and China to start with and work my way around the world. She discouraged these plans, not because she didn’t believe I could do it, I think she discouraged it because she would’ve missed me. She also wanted me to be safe. I have always been very independent. I work well in a team only when I feel I have a direct role. This concerned her because she didn’t want me to end up dead somewhere and no one to have even noticed that I had gone missing. She needed to know that someone, wherever I was, would know if I went missing.

I know she still doesn’t like the idea of me moving, but she has more confidence now. I am part of a team. I am married and my husband is always in my court. I think, for her, knowing I have someone who loves me, someone who will miss me, gives her some comfort and peace in this whole adventure.

Here is some advice. If you have actual people discouraging you for hateful reasons, ignore them, they aren’t worth your time. But if someone is apprehensive because they love you, remember, nothing you do happens in a void. You matter to people. What you do does affect them. That isn’t to say, “Don’t follow your dreams” but just to consider how your dreams affect others. I’m the only biological child my mom has, and even more importantly the only child that was hers to raise. I think for her, she wants to know that I am safe. She has accepted the fact that I am leaving the country this time. Why? Because she has some new things to grasp onto. Do you want to travel, but someone who loves you is worried? See about bringing a friend along. Life is richer when shared anyway. When you pack for your trip, remember your shoes, socks, clothes, etc. But also remember to pack love, kindness, consideration and a friend.